peopleofthedas | ...can't breathe...laughing so hard...

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...can't breathe...laughing so hard...

I am literally crying. Oh, Maker...

I just tried the More Options at the Pearl mod. It is quite possibly the funniest thing I've seen in DAO ever. Seriously.

I had Mira choose Zev and Alistair. The intro has the camera on the boys and then shows pieces of armor being flung onto the floor. I'm playing with Natural Bodies, so of course, everyone's naked and the guys have hard ons. The mod has them doing practically everything you can think of without bringing toys in, all with snippets of dialogue from other places in the game. And to top it all off, the mod's really animated with humans in mind, which means that Alistair's dick was in Mira's eye when she was trying to blow him. Because of the limitations of the engine itself, Mira's o-face is the same as her deeply concerned face, both of which make her look vaguely bored when Alistair's going down on her. ("Blue...I think I'll paint the ceiling...blue.")

Since that was so much fun, I decided to try one of the other options. I got Mira, Amber (the Pearl employee you have to talk to to trigger the whole thing), Leliana and Morrigan. There was Morrigan being spanked, among other things.

The Duncan/Cailan/F!Warden...well, let's just say that one really only works with the human female warden. Also, for some reason the modder made Duncan resemble Liam Neeson in more ways than one.

I honestly can't remember when I've last laughed this hard.

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I have that mod, but the dialogue they used for Aedan/Ali/Zev was so weak I never explored any other options. May have to go back.

It was pretty goofy for a female Warden with those two. The only one that I really thought kind of worked was Ser Perth, which was oddly sweet.

lol! I tried that mod out a few months ago and was thoroughly amused. Loved the parts where my warden's servicing Alistair and Zevran says "This won't take long", and then when they're both standing up and going at her from both ends, "Shall we compete for points?" With the nat-bodies, I think my F/Cousland was pleased. Funniest mod I've ever installed yet.

Yes, no doubt it didn't take very long at all...

I was tempted to say what they say in my WoW guild, "Screencaps, or it didn't happen."

But on this one, I'm willing to take you at your word.

So very, very willing...

"Caps or it didn't happen" is why I still have an ENORMOUS folder of bizarre WoW shit hanging around on my HDD even though I haven't played since BC release. Glitches (like the time the entire server double-spawned), weird-ass dialogue, idiot players, fellow guildies dead, clad only in tabards, in the middle of the road to Moonglade....

The usual.

hahah EXACTLY. My guild is VERY AO and well....amusing mistells and chatter that is taken the wrong way....it happens a LOT.

And that's why I keep my sex scenes vanilla. XD No skullfucking for me, please!

*giggles*

Back to the literal definition of the word "squick", indeed.

I loved trying it with Teagan and Alistair

When Teagan goes....."Dawn has arrived and we've survived the night!" I can't stop laughing!

halway tempted to try that mod <_<

*looks around* Nah. No Loghain in it, and somehow he's the only character in DA that has managed to pique my, er, interest *trundles off again*

*pokes head back around the corner* And hey, the "Do as I command." line? How perfect would that have been?

*falls over and giggles hysterically*

That is too true!

I was disappointed to see that Loghain and Jowan weren't in there. Loghain is my favorite, but something about Jowan is endearing to me. I think it's his desperation. *nods, then goes back to writing*

I know that several people have made suggestions for other characters in the comments. I don't know if the modder's still working on it, but if so, sie might be amenable to adding some other characters, especially if they have dialogue snippets that will work.

Edited 2011-01-04 10:08 (UTC)

hahah I bet this community of Loghain fangirls can find some fitting dialogue for them XD

"For Maric and the Maker!" *giggles*

"I am surprised. Thank you." *lol*

"(Here, some smoked boar saved from supper.) Huh, it'll do you good."
^
If you snip that part...

"Are you satisfied now?" (party banter with Wynne, so this sounds quite terse...)

"We are done here. Let's go home and not speak of this again." *rofl*

oh gods XD

"Maric's sword...what a prize (for the darkspawn that would be)." Cut that part out.

"just keep your moralizing to a minimum."

"Finish your snack"

" Oh, don't give me that face. I'm betting you want the cheese in my pocket. "

"You expected me to be short? "

oh Maker's breath, I'm horrible XD

Edited 2011-01-04 12:41 (UTC)

"You expected me to be short?"

LOL! Even I would like to hear that.

=P Do ANY of us expect the man to be short?

_{I don't.}

Well, I do. The more people worship him the more I hate him, it would seem.

I still lol'ed. ;-)

hahaha that's okay. We need Zev/Anders/Alistair fans to balance us nutters out! <3

I'm on your side; can't stand the man.

I think he's an awesome, complex character. He reminds me a lot of Snape--not just because Alan Rickman would totally play him in the movie--with the "person who does all the wrong things for what he thinks are the right reasons" dynamic.

That said, I have a hard time buying him as a romantic protagonist, especially with a Cousland or a Tabris Warden.

Oh, I absolutely agree that he's well-conceived. I just don't see what's attractive about him. But, then I don't like overtly dominant men, they put my hackles up.

The voice, the brains, the looks (yes, I know I'm weird), and the kindness that sometimes shines through. And the sense of humour. Yes, he's got one, if you look closely ;)
I myself like men who can be dominant - others can't defend themselves against me and run away scared.

Zevran on the other hand - I like the character, but I could never find him attractive. He's got that Latin-Lover thing going on (not just the accent, the whole attitude) and that has always deeply repulsed me for some reason. But to each their own, I suppose. Couldn't bring myself to romance him with any of my Wardens yet...

It's taken me ages to wrap my head around Zev. At first I saw much what you describe. But the loyalty, ye gods. When you get an earring from him he says something like 'I'll remain with you until you tire of me, or until one of us is dead' There is no suggestion at all that he might tire of you. It's simply not an option.

That, BTW, is why I adore your T&S Zevran; you push my loyalty kink buttons so hard with him.

For me, it's the stubborn bullhead-ness, and the fact that, yes, he is an older man. I tend to aim for men 10-15 years older than me, just because they're more mature and know what they want, and that's what resonated with me and my like of Loghain- he knows what he wants and sets out to get it. I dated a man who was ten years my senior once, and Maker's breath it was an amazing relationship. Wouldn't have ended it if I hadn't been moved to his command. DAMN NAVY RULES ON FRATERNIZATION.

I like dominant men, because I myself am dominant, and I love power struggles in the bedroom and relationship- healthy competition between me and my partner is what spices the relationship. I've dumped so many men because they just rolled over and bared their necks. I like winning, but damnit, I want to EARN their submission!

And what owlet said- his very dry sardonic sense of humor (so dry you miss it sometimes) and the calculating intelligence is what gets me. I have YET to find a man that was my match intellectually (but then again, I live in lower Alabama, go figure *sigh*) but if i find one, I just hope he isn't a cowed book worm that rolls over at the slightest sign of a scuffle.

I just...can't get my female characters to romance Zevran- they get very close to him, but never romance. Alistair? Yeeeeaaahhh, no. He's sarcastic and his little banters are hilarious (The whole line about beating the blight with his thorny weapon, or the line of Princess Stabbity crack me up) but overall he's too naive and sensitive. I might make a tender little mage who's scared to death of templars that he can romance (the idea of him being overtly sweet and tender to a terrified mage is endearing to me) but my head strong nobles and elves wouldn't go for him.

Hmm. I rambled again.

For me, it's the stubborn bullhead-ness

Stubborn can be hot; it's when stubborn bull-headedness gets a body count that I find it problematic. That's my issue with romancing Loghain, in a nutshell: while his intentions may have been good, his actions or actions he condoned led to people being killed, tortured, and enslaved.

I can see that not being an issue for some Wardens--an Aeducan, for example, might simply regard it as how the game is played--but for others, it's really difficult for me to imagine they'd be willing to forgive Loghain enough to actually romance him. I've read and enjoyed Loghain/Tabris and Loghain/Cousland, but I just can't write it.

Oh no, I understand that, totally- While I DO have a penchant for villains (Thrax from Osmosis Jones, and Visser Three from Animorphs come to mind), the villains I usually fancy are just straight up evil and have no romantic interests, whereas Loghain was a good man once, and due to the desperation of wanting to protect what he fought and sacrificed so much for, he went over the deep end. It's part of what makes him appeal to me so much, because it just ADDS to his depth as a character. I really do applaud Bioware/Gaider for his creation.

As far as "realistically romancing" him with Tabris/Cousland, this is true, and for my noble, well, as will be posted in my fic when that chapter comes around, she kinda...snaps when she finds out what he did. After losing her parents, nephew and sister in law, only to have her knight in shining armor do what he did...she loses it, and is so DESPERATE to have ONE thing work out right, she looses sight of EVERYTHING just to have him redeemed in her eyes, regardless of how everyone else sees him. So, in summation, it's not so much a romance as it is two people who've gone past the point of no return trying to salvage something they desperately want.

I even played her out in that regard, too- she started out as a spitfire, but was kind and merciful- after it was discovered that Loghain set Zevran after her, poisoned Eamon, and had his men attack the Bannorns that didn't agree with his methods, she just....stopped caring. She only cared about getting what needed to be done, done, so she could have Eamon call the Landsmeet and meet him head on, and try to convince him to atone for what he did. Took the political path of least resistance in Orzammar, didn't waste time trying to talk things over with the werewolves- just killed them outright. She even let the Tevinter run off with the remaining elves. Nothing mattered to her but getting to Loghain and "saving him."

Even after he was made into a Warden, and she "had him back" she was still utterly blind to what he did. She herself was no longer entirely a good person. It's a combination of unhealthy obsession and blind infatuation that collided with the vulnerable state of loss and grief, leading to an unstable mental state.

It's going to be interesting to write, that's for sure.

edit: Argh, can I just say, that this community has been AMAZING for discussion? I love you guys!

Edited (<3333333) 2011-01-05 09:11 (UTC)

...and interesting to read. I'm curious: do you find it hard to do that kind of playthrough?

Also, what are you doing up, woman? It's like what, 3:30 where you are?

It is, and it isn't. I admit, I sometimes vent my frustrations of real life through the game. I myself had a "knight in shining armor" who betrayed me by disappearing without a trace when I joined the Navy to support the both of us, and I did go off the deep end in my attempts to try to rectify what he'd done, because he was my first real love, my first lover, and my fiancee.

It took me years to come to terms with it, but I never got official closure, as I still have no idea what happened to him. I got at least a sense of informal closure by finishing that campaign with that particular character of mine. Who needs therapy? (I kid, I did see a professional and it helped, but silly enough, that particular campaign did things for me that the therapy didn't.)

I ended that campaign in October 2009, and it was an...odd feeling, it really was. I had forgiven him for hurting me, but never forgave myself for the people I hurt. After seeing my own actions through a different set of eyes, and seeing how people were affected by them (albeit killing werewolves and taking the side of the corrupt instead of shunning friends and family) I felt like I could forgive myself, and I did. While I still go back and play her on different saves, and do things slightly differently, I don't change much. I left Sabia in camp to think about everything. It's part of the reason I felt the need to write her story, because it helps.

AANNND I'm done making you feel awkward XD

It is 3:30, but I'm a night owl and work the night shift at work- i go to bed at 6Am and work from 4 to 12am. =3

Thanks for sharing; it's an interesting story. I think that's why I love Bioware so much, that sense of identifying with the character. Mira's got some elements of who I am, who I wish I could be, and who I'm afraid of becoming. This may be why I'm doing a third playthrough with her. *rolls eyes at self*

4-12? Wow, that's real second shift, not my 12-9 thing. My problem is that I'm going to bed around 6 these days myself.

Thank you for reading my rambling <3 And it is why I adore Bioware so much.

And yeah, 4-12 is an average shift- we close at 11, but since it's a bookstore, we have to straighten the shelves and that can take a while. XD

And now it is bed time for me!

I love the wildly OT discussions, too. This is the only DA comm which provides so much freedom to get to know people. And I looove getting to know people.

Exactly =D The other one on LJ is so....dead it seems.

Ah, Alistair's my boy, first and foremost. Give me a man who is capable of great things, but requires nurturing, and I'm a happy woman.

And Loghain's age... what is he, fifty, maybe? Four years older than me, but he looks like shit. Has he slept any time in the last decade?

Yeah I believe Loghain is like, later 40's early fifties.

<_< Do war heroes sleep? I know my grandfather didn't XD I think the circles under his eyes come from chasing after Maric and Cailan XDD

Chasing after Maric and Cailan with yacketty sax playing in the background...

oh gods! The mental image! Loghain chasing Cailan and maric, who are chasing after women, all to Yakety Sax.

FFFFF ....can't....breathe

@ ScaryLady - bwwaaaaahhahaha! A hard life, full of regrets will do that to anyone I suppose.

---- Apologies for the rant below, but where else was I to put it? And the "more options at the pearl mod" WAS hilarious ----

Very tantalizing discussions/answers from all on this post/thread. I know, I'm a day late & a dinero short. But that's what happens when you work 72-hrs/wk and only get to read snippets at a time. And now I am moved to provide an analysis of male companions for the female grey warden. Tick-tock, tick-frakkin-tock.

Sorry, but there's no way I could ever imagine Loghain as romanceable for any of my characters, male or female. He just seems too much past his prime. Warped, twisted & made all the wrong choices for all the wrong reasons. Selling elves? Sorry dude, but that’s an F-minus in my book. And I mean – really! He wants to think of his dead wife when he's got a hot bod like Morrigan about to go down on him?!? He needs to go to the boneyard with a quickness.

Now, Sten. Hmmm…. He does have a certain appeal in that big, strong macho-man, ohmahgawd is that a baseball bat or are you happy to see me kinda way, but seriously – the guy is the Sten. He deserves respect and is pretty darn interesting when you get to know him. But my wardens are not so much into banging potential invaders of their country; especially not ones with such a religious fanatical, major superiority complex thing going on.

Oghren. ::Belch:: A serious case of the ick-ies. Great for comic relief, and everybody needs a drunk friend or two. But let’s just say that even my dwarf-gals wanted a guy who could actually tell the difference between them and the nug at the end of the day. Need I say more?

Alistair. Now there's an interesting, odd sort of fellow. My first few Couslands fell for him, but this guy’s got a few too many hang-ups for any sensible co-ruler to ignore. Inevitably, they became a bit peeved with his semi-altruistic naïveté, got tired of his awkwardness and cheesy jokes and decided to have Zev as a side dish whilst playing Princess. Shame on them! Bad Couslands.

Hence, Zevran became the one & only for any warden I'd play since my first two games (37 since). I have a very twisted sense of humor and am intrigued by violent characters with dark and seemingly terrible pasts. And the bad-ass sort of nonchalant attitude where nothing is sacred and anything can happen... wow. Everything from his being an assassin/slave, raised in a house of ill repute to the mental picture of him running naked across rooftops away from some lovers’ cuckolded and very irate husband just makes him seem very lifelike. (Or is it just that I’ve spent too much time in SE Asia and truth is stranger than fiction sometimes??) Talk about character development. And I totally understand why he SEEMS sleazy because he doesn't even want to mention a certain 4-letter word - but by golly, he's the only one who proves just how much he cares with his ACTIONS. Cause anybody can say words, but the follow-through is what counts. Zevran's loyalty, his up-front & in-your-face attitude, his sense of humor, his pain, his strength, his teasing flirtations, and his own special, crazy brand of l-u-v made my wardens fall head over heels for him over and over again.

Blonde, short, cute, cocky and muy caliente with a heart of platinum. Thank the gods there’s no one like that walking around IRL or I’d be in trouble. Dammmit. Sorry Sepheroth, you were great and all as a first video game love interest, but Zevran is frakkin AWESOME-SAUCE.

::gasp:: I spelled Sephiroth's name wrong! [crawls under covers and hides]

You've done thirty seven runs of the game? :O

yep. 39 times. went a lil nuts when i first bought the game & got a week off to play. after trying out every origin combination i used cheats & other console commands to advance to plot points more quickly of course.

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...can't breathe...laughing so hard...

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Way OT, but it's my post

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