Blood Wound Chapter 15

[miri1984]

I've been neglecting Alim because DA2 ATE MY BRAIN but of course, this story still goes on. It's naturally become even MORE Anders-centric though. What can I say? I'm a total slave to that pixelated hunk of manliness. There's probably a pill I can take for it. BUT YOU HAVE TO WANT TO BE CURED!!!

Title: Apathy is a Weakness
Words: 1300
Characters: Anders, Alim, Justice
Rating: T
Summary: Camp fire talks on the road to Amaranthine.

"So… what do spirits do in the fade all day?" Anders hadn't really left off badgering the spirit since they killed the Baronness. Alim wondered how long Justice would put up with it. Certainly the first few times Anders had started asking questions he had been shut down pretty quickly, but Justice didn't seem to know how to handle the man, who was relentless in his curiosity.

Justice heaved a sigh. They were a day away from Amaranthine. Alim needed to stop there to see the Dark Wolf, Anders was still keen to meet whoever it was they'd managed to miss on their first visit and Nathaniel had apparently had word that his sister had survived the Blight and was married. Sigrun was starry eyed at the thought of visiting a human town and Oghren…

Well Oghren he suspected wanted to get drunk. Alim was going to have words with him about it.

"Time is not as… harsh in the fade as it is here, mage," the fade spirit was saying. It had taken a lot of ingenuity and some fairly creative herbalism to find a way for Kristoff's body to be less… repugnant, but every now and then Alim would remember that he used to be a human being and shudder. Not to mention that his healing sense went completely haywire whenever Justice was "injured". Anders and he had spent a great deal of time…. working things out, as it were. Alim had ordered the spirit to keep his helm on in the city, though. There was no reason to alarm the populace with their walking corpse recruit. "When you say 'all day' I have difficulty applying it to the way time passes in the fade. I observed. I acted, when I could. In between, I simply was."

"But demons don't just sit around, do they? They're constantly looking for ways to get across the veil…"

"I know little of demons," Justice said.

That's surprisingly reassuring, Alim thought, rubbing his hand where he had cut it. He knew he had made contact with a demon when he'd healed Anders in the deep roads, but the contact had been fleeting and Alim hadn't been game to try it again. The book had explicitly warned against using blood magic the way he had been forced to. The rituals and sigils for an initial casting were meant to protect you against the most desperate and needy demons - the ones who were most likely to attempt to possess you should you contact them.

Alim had forged a link with the first demon handy. It was almost certainly going to come back to bite him later.

"You must know something about them. They lived with you. They were your neighbours."

"Anders, give it a rest, will you?" Alim said. "Justice is probably tired of all your questions."

"I do not get tired," Justice interjected.

Alim rolled his eyes. "I'm trying to help you here, Justice," he said. "You don't have to answer Anders' questions if you don't want to."

"The mage raises interesting points," Justice said. "But I would be grateful for silence for a time."

Anders pouted at Alim, but was good natured enough to let that slide.

At camp that night the tables were turned somewhat. Justice started pestering Alim and Anders about mages in general. How did they live, what did they do… it was as though he couldn't get enough of the world now that he was in it. When Anders started describing the Tower, however, Alim sat back in shock.

He had always loved the Tower. Or at least, enjoyed his time there. It had never really hit home to him that he couldn't leave, because truly, where would he go? Templars were a fact of life - a nuisance to be avoided. In the meantime there were books and spells and clean beds and ample food, things he knew he would never have had in the Alienage. There were other freedoms, too, that would have been denied him. Destined for an arranged marriage at eighteen to whatever elven woman his parents picked out for him, Alim would never have been allowed to explore certain sides to his nature and almost certainly would have ended up miserable as a result, even if he hadn't shown signs of magic.

Possibly not more miserable than I am now though, he thought, suddenly thinking of Zevran. Then he shuddered. The thought of living an Alienage life - married with children and all the trappings therein was less than appealing. At least we had our time together, he thought. Then wondered at himself. It was the first time he'd thought of Zevran without raging pain. The ache was still there, but there was something else…

For Anders it was different. He'd been taken much older (it shocked Alim to realise that he'd only arrived at the tower a few weeks after him - he'd always assumed the older man had been there for years) and he had a home, a family that he knew and cared about and…

Alim knew he should have stopped Anders from telling Justice all of this. In the back of his mind warning bells were going off. This was a spirit he didn't understand. Even with Nate and Sigrun and Oghren asleep, even though there was just the three of them, keeping Justice company before his long and lonely watch (it was a blessing, having a corpse who couldn't sleep in their company, Alim didn't remember the last time he'd been able to stay asleep all night when on the move) it still seemed too personal. He almost got up and left, but part of him was too fascinated by the story, so different from his own.

Of course Anders didn't give details, but Alim could fill in some blanks. That was why Anders' first escape attempt happened just after the mass transfer to Kirkwall. This was why Ser William had met that unfortunate accident after Satanalia that one year.

"Maker's breath, Anders," Alim said when the mage had fallen silent finally, staring into the fire with darkened eyes. "You really got the short end of the stick, didn't you?"

The older mage fixed him with a quizzical glare. "You were always the charmed child," he said finally. "Me, I had to make my own luck. And I had my fair share of that, let me tell you. I didn't do that to Ser William because he managed to get at me after all."

"If Greagior had found out about that, you'd be tranquil," Alim pointed out.

"He never found out."

Justice was watching the two of them. It was hard to judge expression on that rotting face, but the voice was outraged. "This is not right," the spirit said. "You have both faced injustice, and are now free. Why do you do nothing for your fellow mages?"

Anders looked scandalised. "Because it sounds difficult?"

"You have a duty!"

Alim and Anders looked at each other. Alim shrugged and Anders bit his lip, looking slightly troubled.

"Where do you suppose we should start, Justice?" Alim said. "Truly? The Chantry controls the Templars, and the circles. The only place mages are even vaguely free is in Tevinter and it's…. not particularly nice there, from what I've heard."

"You must strike a blow against your oppressors."

"Just the one?" Anders said, smirking. Alim laughed a little.

"I have enough to do, Justice," Alim said. "Darkspawn and all that," he poked at the fire, but Anders was watching the former fade spirit, thoughtfully.

"What about you…. Anders?" Justice said. "You don't have the responsibilities of the Commander. You could help your fellows overcome their oppression."

"Or I could bide my time in case the Templars come knocking."

"Apathy is a weakness!"

"So is death! I'm just saying!"

Alim held up his hands. "Much as the plight of mages in Thedas is dear to my heart, gentlemen, we have a lot of walking to do tomorrow and Anders and I should sleep."

Justice looked about to argue again, but Alim got up and moved to his tent. Anders shrugged and did the same, although Alim noticed the man looked more thoughtful than usual.

Maker's breath, I probably should have thought this whole fade-spirit as a warden thing through a bit more, he thought as he settled down to sleep. Still. He's good in a fight, and kind of… sweet in his way. He smiled to himself, thinking of Justice's indignant words. It was nice, to think that someone who embodied a virtue thought Alim was in the right.

He rubbed his hand where it was scarred and rolled onto his side to sleep.

Comments

[amhran_comhrac]

This interaction was fantastic... I can't help but think Alim will REALLY be kicking himself later on when he finds out what Anders did.
I love how you're writing this with an eye on the future, it works so well.

[solitae]

*sigh* A look at Anders and Justice pre-merge makes me wistful. I love the conversation, the understanding of Anders' background that Alim didn't have before.

Poor Alim and his ignoring his warning bells. I can't blame him though. Justice was so earnest and well-meaning.