Chapter Sixty-One and Sixty-Two

[lenna_nightrunner]

A Dalish-centric AU gen fic featuring two Mahariel Wardens, one bastard prince, and lingering ghosts.

Title: Vir Lath Sa'vunin (We Love One More Day)
Rating: T
Authors: twist_shimmy and lenna_nightrunner
Post Word Count: 4845
Summary: When their parents died, Tesni Mahariel was left to raise her brother Caerwyn with the help of the rest of their clan. True to their penchant for getting into trouble, Caerwyn and Tamlen went hunting one day and ran afoul of a mirror, of all things. The next thing Tesni knew, Caerwyn had been recruited by the Grey Wardens. As if she’d let some shemlen just take her brother away! Determined to keep Caerwyn safe, Tesni goes after them, and antics ensue. She’ll stop the Blight to protect her family, Caerwyn will help--grumbling all the while--and Alistair will do his best to bond with his tattooed and bristly new brethren. When all is said and done, the blurred lines between friendship and blood bonds will draw them down a path that will change all three of them forever.


Of blood and brotherhood.

Chapter Sixty-One: We Won't Let Them Take You, We Won't Let You Die. (Hum)

TESNI


“I can’t do this.”

Zevran tsked and forced me to keep grinding the mixture he’d placed in the mortar before me. “Tesora, this was your idea.”

I twisted the pestle and grimaced as things squished. “What if the needle slips?”

“In your hands? You do not slip.”

“There’s a first time for everything,” I muttered. “And what if he winces and the pattern comes in funny?”

Zevran stopped my hands with his and forced me to look at him. “If you are going to give him the mark of an adult, have the sense to see him as one.”

Creators’ sa-- no, he was right. I was getting chastised on Dalish culture by a-- a non-Dalish. Something about that seemed wrong. But he had a point, so I smiled weakly and went back to preparing Alistair’s vallaslin.

Caerwyn and I had decided on a blue-grey, partially because it was similar enough to ours to send a clear message to anyone who might see the three of us together. Black would have utterly overwhelmed his face, especially because he had brown eyes instead of bright blue like ours, so we went with the next most obvious choice.

I’d memorized the pattern over the course of the week, and Zevran had gone so far as to make me tattoo it onto a sodding ham-hock for practice. As infuriating as it had been, the practice had done a lot for my nerves. I could recreate the pattern, and so assuming he didn’t twitch--no, Tesni, stop--our dorf’len would have griffons on both temples.

It might not have been a symbol of his god, but it was the mark of our clan, and that was good enough. We couldn’t have given him a Dalish pattern, after all; it would have been utterly pointless. And dangerous. And a host of other bad things. We had enough trouble already without tempting the Trickster so directly.

“Well, go get him.”

“You know the others want to watch, yes?”

“They’re allowed,” I said, and tried not to sigh. How had Marethari not died of nervousness before doing my face, or Caerwyn’s? If I were a keeper, everyone would have gotten a single line across their foreheads.

“Then I shall bring your willing victim to your office, tesora. No fleeing into the forest, hmmm?” He tapped me under the chin, and I strained and bottled the ink as his footsteps echoed down the hall.

He would bleed, I reminded myself as I took the long wooden needles I’d be using into my hands. That was normal. I’d have to keep the non-Wardens of the clan well away, just in case.

When I arrived at my office, everyone except Shale surprised me by being there. Even Sten, who was standing in the corner with his arms crossed, but appeared... interested? I wouldn’t go so far as to say entertained. Nearby, Wynne was idly mixing a mug of something she’d been insisting all day would keep my hands from cramping, and Leliana was trying to wrangle Alistair’s hair out of his eyes.

“Stop tugging, Lel,” he whined. “That sodding hurts!”

“Stop being such a baby,” she chided, and shoved at his shoulder. To my surprise, he nearly fell over.

“...Alistair, are you drunk?”

He blinked at me a few times. “Tesni! Hi! Uh, little bit.”

“More than that!” Caerwyn giggled. I sniffed at him suspiciously, and my fears were realized. They’d both been drinking.

“It’s my fault, commander,” Oghren slurred from where he was leaning against the wall behind them. “Both of ‘em looked more worried than new fathers. You puttin’ a tattoo on his face, or havin’ a baby?”

“We’ll see,” I said.

Unconventional clans get to bend the rules. Fine. At least he’d shaved like I’d asked.

“Caerwyn, help him lie down.”

My brother took a step, then clung to a table. “Alistair, lie down over there.”

“Got it.” He swayed forward, and to my relief Leliana took him by the arm and helped him arrange himself against the pallet.

“Get comfortable, brother,” I said, sinking to my knees beside him. “Once I start, we don’t move until your pattern is complete.”

He beamed at me. “I trust you.”

My embarrassed flush was cut short by a knock on the doorframe. “Forgive me, but this seems rather interesting.”

I looked up to find Riordan standing awkwardly in the doorway. “Come in! We’re giving Alistair a tattoo, and you’re more than welcome to watch.”

He made an interesting face. “So long as you promise not to do the same to me.”

“Deal.”

Riordan was still hovering somewhere between brother and clan. Rather willfully, and I wasn’t about to push the issue, especially since it was becoming more and more clear that he disapproved of the way I treated the others.

Beside my knees, Alistair sighed and took a deep breath. “Okay, let’s do this before the ale wears off.”

“Close your eyes, brother.” He obeyed, and I dipped the first needle into the ink.

Once my initial panic had worn off, the transformation I was causing proved mesmerizing. Prick, bleed. Wipe his face occasionally when it got hard to see through the trickles of blood the needle had drawn from his skin. Dip the needle, repeat. Beneath my hand, the griffon took shape, rearing toward his eyes while its tail curved like a vine across his cheek.

From the front, the finished tattoo would look organic, like ours. But from the sides, the griffons would be as clear as the pair emblazoned across the front of his armor.

I was halfway through the second tattoo when I gave in and drained the cup Wynne had made for me. At my knees, Alistair rolled his shoulders and blinked a few times, and I smiled down at him and told him he was doing well. He hadn’t so much as hissed a single time during the process.

Caerwyn came to sit beside me while I stretched my fingers and checked the tip of the needle to make sure it wasn’t getting blunted.

“Huh. It’s backwards!” he said, and then grinned like an ass when I hit him in the chest.

“Don’t you dare try to scare him like that.”

“You and Tamlen were making comments about how Marethari got tired and just ‘gave up’ when I got mine.”

“She did, da’vhenan. Why do you think the right side of your face barely has a tattoo at all?”

Caerwyn snorted, and Alistair glared up at us both.

“Fine, fine. We’ll finish it, lethallin.”

Prick, bleed. An hour later, and our brother had been claimed for the clan forever.



I woke the next morning with more energy than usual and decided to see if any of the soldiers wanted to spar before breakfast. Riordan and Caerwyn had been waking them up early each day to test them, and seemed more than happy to let me put their blades to work. I strapped myself into my armor and picked a spare dagger from the armory before following the sounds of steel to the courtyard.

“Warden-Commander,” Riordan said by way of greeting, and the soldiers paused and turned to stare. That never got less unsettling with time, and recently it seemed like they’d been glaring at my tattoo.

...Shems.

I drew my daggers and spun one in my hand as I finished crossing the courtyard. “I was wondering if any of the soldiers wanted to try their luck this morning.” I scanned the lines of shuffling men and women.

Riordan chuckled and crossed his arms. “Any volunteers?”

“Sure, why not?” A bearded shem stepped forward and spit onto the cobbles. “Let’s see what the other elf can do.”

Disarm him in three moves and put a dagger to his throat was definitely not the outcome he was expecting. I saw anger in his eyes as the other soldiers snickered and elbowed each other. “Again,” I said, and lowered my blade.

He took each miss of his blade personally, and soon was swinging wildly, red-faced with rage, while his companions jeered and goaded him on. I dodged until he was exhausted, then kicked him to the cobbles.

“Ouch,” came a familiar voice, and I looked up to see Alistair crossing the courtyard. His voice was amused, but he was trying very hard not to smile because of the angry, raw tattoos on both temples. “This is why I don’t duel you anymore, commander.”

“Maker’s breath,” muttered one of the guards. “What’s wrong with his face?”

The soldier I’d been sparring with clambered to his feet and glared down at me. “One more time,” he demanded, and scowled when I shook my head.

“Let someone else try, if they want to.” He was boring me.

“You not know how this works? Dueling’s best of three before it’s over.”

“One of three still means you lost twice,” I said, and turned to go inspect Alistair’s face. It didn’t look like he’d put the salve on the tattoos like I’d told him t--

“Sodding knife-eared, brotherfucking bitch,” the soldier muttered at my back, and I stopped cold and whirled to face him again.

“What.” When he grinned, I drew my knives again. “What!”

“That hit a nerve, didn’t it, cutie?”

My mouth worked, and I stared to my brothers in shock. They thought because we-- that I--

His smile faded when I launched myself at him. I must have been screaming, because around me all movement ground to a halt. I slashed at his neck with both knives, sending him staggering backward, and tripped him with a kick. He went down, and I followed, landing with my knees on his chest to wind him.

Wait. I forced myself not to send my blades home. I dropped the one in my off-hand and let it clatter to the stones beside us.

Three deep breaths later and the offending shem was pinned beneath me and my remaining knife was pressed against his jugular vein. He reached for my hair, and I pressed just deep enough to send a trickle of blood to the cobbles.

“I will kill you if you ever say anything like that again,” I managed, keeping my voice low enough that the others wouldn’t be able to hear. “I raised him. He is my son. And just because you’re too backward to understand that we’re not like you, shem, doesn’t mean you get to spew filth at me and my clan.”

Something was aching behind my eyes, and he stared up at me in terror as I struggled to breathe evenly and not kill him like my fingers were begging me to allow. “Riordan!”

“Warden-Commander?”

“See to it that this man is removed from the keep today.”

“You can’t do that!” protested the idiot under me. “I serve Bann Teagan!”

“And Bann Teagan answers to me.”

“To the Void with that, you knife-eared whore! You can’t tell a human noble what to do with his own men!”

I was about to cut his face like a peach when Alistair’s fingers wrapped around my wrist. “Sister.” He took my dagger away, and I let him haul me off of the--there were not words--

“Get him out of here before I have Shale punish him for insubordination,” I hissed through clenched teeth, and stalked for the keep.

No one disturbed me until that afternoon, so I was able to spend a good deal of time silently fuming in my office. But when I heard the door click open behind me, I sighed and resigned myself to some long talk about how I probably shouldn’t stab soldiers.

But it wasn’t Riordan, or Teagan, or Wynne.

“I have a confession to make, tesora.” Zevran’s voice sounded from behind me as I stared out the window and watched Caerwyn making it hard for Leliana to train the bann’s soldiers.

“Is it going to cheer me up?”

“Unlikely.”

I turned my head and raised an eyebrow. “What did you do?”

He crossed the room and looked down at my shoes. “It occurs to me that I might be at least partially responsible for the soldier’s little outburst today.”

“...What?”

Apparently Zevran had been harassing the servants. I rubbed at my temples while he told me everything he’d heard them gossiping about over the past few days. “And while I said nothing that would have agreed with such things, I think that they might have taken my additional lies as a sign that the ones they were spreading were also true.”

I slammed my hands against the windowsill. “They think that I am fucking my brother. And you’re telling me you made it worse?”

“I am.”

I whirled and swung for his face, but he dodged and seized my wrists. When I kicked at his knees, he backed me into the wall, keeping too close for me to get in another blow.

“You idiot!”

He sighed against my ear and spoke into my neck. “I am dying of boredom, tesora.”

“So you decided to share this by making my life miserable?” I tried to pull my hands free, and he slammed me into the wall with more force.

“I was trying to keep entertained. It seemed a harmless diversion. What is there for me to do here? Half the time, I do not even have the pleasure of your company. And when I do, I cannot enjoy it, because you asked me to keep our relationship secret from your clan.”

My eyes met his, expecting anger, and instead saw hurt and disappointment, which felt like a punch to the stomach.

I closed my eyes and sagged against his shoulder. “...Fen’lin. Emma ir abelas, mireth.”[1]

“Tesora?”

“I’m an awful woman. It’s terrible.”

“Tsk, tsk.” His arms wrapped around my waist, and I felt his breath on my ear again. “You are amazing when you are awful.”

“Mmmm.” He was getting very good at distracting me by nibbling my ear. “I’ll forgive you for this if you forgive me for not letting you hug me in public. And then we both promise each other never to do it again.”

“I might be convinced to do such a thing.”

“Oh?” I raised an eyebrow at him, and he gave me a smile that always made me feel just a little bit wobbly.

“Perhaps you could slam me into a few walls, yes? Knock some sense into this skull of mine?”

I chuckled and began removing my gauntlets. “Lock the door.”



I waited until the keep sounded relatively empty before leaving the safety of my office. I’d missed all three meals and was frankly ravenous after my fight with the soldier and my afternoon with Zevran, so turned immediately for the kitchens.

A few minutes later I stumbled across Caerwyn, holding two plates. He held one out to me silently, and I took it and led us to the great hall.

It was empty. Thank the Creators. We took a table close to the fire and settled in to eat.

“Thanks, da’vhenan,” I told my brother, then frowned when he didn’t bristle like normal.

Caerwyn stabbed at a slice of cold meat. “I thought you’d kill him.”

“I almost did.”

“I would’ve.” When he saw me grin, he scowled. “I would’ve.”

“I know.”

He was about to say something else when loud footsteps caught our attention. We turned to find Alistair walking toward us, grinning tiredly.

“Caerwyn has been trying to feed you all day, sister,” he chuckled, sitting across from us and sagging against the chairback. “I see he finally managed it.”

"So how badly did I mess things up?” I asked, and breathed a sigh of relief when Alistair shrugged.

“Riordan spent all day telling me he’s seen worse happen. Won’t tell me what worse things he’s seen, of course. But Teagan threw the soldier out and had a chat with the others about respecting the Wardens, so....”

Caerwyn sulked against my shoulder, and I looked down at him in concern.

“Should’ve killed him,” he managed, then swallowed thickly.

I sighed and ran a hand over his hair. “Hush. That would have made things worse.”

“I don’t know,” Alistair said, grinning over the table at us both. “It makes me feel special to have a sister who nearly murders a man for saying bad things about us.”

Caerwyn sagged harder against me with a little sigh of agreement, and I felt myself smiling. It was nice to have brothers who appreciated my failings.

---

Chapter Sixty-Two: After the Cut Then Comes the Blood, Falls to the Dirt, Turns Into Mud. From This Soil We’ll Grow Together. (Guster)

CAERWYN

After Tesni’d nearly sliced that shem’s throat open she’d decided there was no point trying to be ‘polite’ about sleeping in the same bed when the nightmares came anymore. Let the shems talk. Next time I’d be the one with my knife at one of their throats if they said anything to our faces.

Or Alistair’s face. Which I couldn’t stop staring at. Well, mostly I wouldn’t stop staring at it, because it was too much fun watching him get self-conscious about it. But I made it my mission to walk around the keep and yard with him and stare down anyone who so much as looked at his face the wrong way.

It was probably a good thing I wasn’t the Warden-Commander.

Especially now that there was so much tension at the keep. Everyone was restless, and the shems and the flat-ears all either hated or feared Tesni and me and had started to lose the respect Alistair’d earned from them when we’d been gone. If something didn’t happen soon, things could get very, very bad.

I realized how much of a Grey Warden I’d become when something that was supposed to be bad happened and I was relieved: darkspawn. Thank the Creators, that was something I knew how to deal with.

“Urgent message, Warden-Commander!”

The man’d practically fallen off his frothing horse and sprinted to where Tesni was talking to Riordan outside the main door. When he thrust a scroll of parchment at Riordan, I saw Tesni bristle. She was never going to look the part of the ‘Commander of the Grey.’ Riordan shook his head and gestured to Tesni, and the messenger gasped his apologies and handed her the parchment.

“Take this man to the main hall and see that he gets food and water,” Riordan said to the nearest guard. The messenger hesitated. “Do not worry, friend,” said Riordan, “we will send our own messenger with our reply. You and your horse need rest.”

He was right about that. I took the reins of the messenger’s abandoned mare and patted her neck, which was damp with sweat. The poor girl was exhausted. I looked over to the stables and saw Cyrus already on his way to get the mare. That boy didn’t miss much.

“What does it say?” Riordan asked Tesni as her eyes scanned the message.

“The Blight’s reached the Bannorn,” she said as she read. “This bann wants our help defending his lands. We’ll need to leave as soon as we can get ready.” Tesni looked up at Riordan. “Tell Bann Teagan and Wynne, and send a messenger to the bann.”

“Yes, commander,” Riordan said, and strode quickly inside.

“We’re leaving?” I asked Tesni, and she nodded.

“Ready to fight something you can actually cut?” she asked me.

I grinned as I unsheathed one of my daggers and spun it in my hand. “Creators, yes.”

Within fifteen minutes Tesni had the four of us locked in her office, looking over that map she’d shown me before. She pointed at the place in the middle that didn’t have any of those symbols that meant mountains.

“A little over a day away,” said Riordan. “Maybe a day and a half on foot. Though you three will ride, of course.”

I blinked in confusion. “Why?”

Both Riordan and Alistair raised their eyebrows at me.

“Because you will be leading the army.”

I narrowed my eyes at my new brother. He didn’t have to make everything sound like it should be obvious.

Tesni nodded. Apparently everyone knew how the whole army thing worked except me. I wasn’t going to complain about riding Miharel again, but it just seemed silly to me. It wasn’t as if the horses were going to get us there any faster if everyone else was walking.

“Bann Teagan will ride, as well,” said Tesni, “and so will you.”

“Commander--”

“You’re a Grey Warden, brother. And I need you to help Teagan lead the soldiers. Caerwyn, Alistair, and I will be a little... busy.”

Something about the glint in her eye and the tone of her voice made me smirk.

“All right, lieutenants,” she said to Alistair and me, testing the strange words she had to use now, “let’s go inform the troops of our strategy.”

Alistair grinned and saluted her. “Yes, commander.”

I rolled my eyes and mimicked his salute in a way that made Riordan sigh deeply. “Yes, commander.”

The keep became overwhelmingly busy in the space of an hour. Alistair said it reminded him of the preparations at Ostagar, but I barely remembered Ostagar, and a lot of that’d happened before we’d gotten there anyway.

We were going to be gone for three days at the most, so Leliana and I were packed and had our weapons, armor, and supplies ready within an hour. I was going to help Cyrus make sure Miharel, Dorf’asha, and Bann Teagan’s horse would be ready to ride, but when I’d checked on him he was already taking care of it.

Alistair would be riding Cielo Negro, and after some debate, I decided Riordan should ride Bijou. The mare was big and sturdy enough for him, and had been around darkspawn before. Zevran and Leliana were supposed to walk because we had to act like the Wardens and the bann were more important than everyone else. I gave up trying to understand the reasoning behind it and just did what Tesni told me to.

“I’m bored,” I muttered as I ran my fingers through Chat’len’s thick coat. He made a sound of approval when I scratched behind his ears. Leliana, Zevran, Chat’len, and I were all sitting on my huge shem bed, hiding out until dinnertime. I probably could’ve found a way to be useful, but I wasn’t in the mood to talk to any soldiers. Tesni wouldn’t be very happy if I mistook one of them for the one who’d insulted her. Most of them looked the same.

“As am I,” agreed Zevran. He had his back propped against the wall and was playing with his knives. I was lying down with my head in Leliana’s lap while we both idly petted Chat’len at our side.

Leliana sighed. “Moi aussi.”[2]

The door opened, letting in the endless stream of clanks and tings of plates of armor scraping against each other. Walking and fighting with a hundred men and women encased in metal was going to be wonderful.

“Shut the door,” I said to Alistair, and sighed in relief when the sound was muffled again.

"Maker!" He sat on the bed next to Zevran and rubbed at his face wearily. "Where did they all come from?"

Leliana giggled. "They have been here all along."

"It didn't seem like there were so many of them when they were out sparring." He relaxed against the wall. "Are all of you ready to go?"

Zevran and Leliana nodded while I made a 'yes' sound.

"How long do you think it'll be before Tesni realizes where we've gone?" Alistair said.

"Not soon, I hope," I muttered.

And then of course the door opened and shut again.

"Fen'lin."

"Blast it."

"Merde."[3]

"Mierda."[4]

Tesni crossed her arms and stared at us in disapproval. "Having a nap?"

I sat up and propped my arms on my knees. "We're all ready to leave."

"Then help other people get ready."

"They don't want our help."

Tesni came over to the bed and flicked my ear.

"Ow!"

"You're Grey Wardens." She looked at Alistair and me in turn. "Go give some orders. I don't care what you do, just lead."

"That is a dangerous amount of freedom to grant, tesora," said Zevran with a chuckle. Tesni gave him a warning look.

"Creators help me, Zevran, if you--"

"I know, I know." He got up and kissed her on the cheek. "I promise to cause as little trouble as I can until we are on the road."

Tesni took a deep breath, and her expression softened. "Thank you."

"Of course, it is very difficult for me not to cause trouble."

He'd grinned and fled for the door before Tesni's eyes'd narrowed.

When she turned back toward us Alistair and I were reluctantly getting out of bed and heading for the door.

"Come, Chat'len." Leliana smiled and urged him back onto the floor. "Maybe you should go hunting. We are going to be walking a great distance tomorrow."

There was hardly time for dinner, or sleep, or breakfast before we were all assembled in front of the keep before dawn. I mounted Miharel, and Alistair and I moved to flank Tesni. Bann Teagan and Riordan would ride behind us, because apparently that was another one of those things you were supposed to do when you had an army.

A bit of shuffling and clanking of armor, and then Tesni raised her arm in the air and gave the signal.

"Move out!"

We traveled until Tesni decided we were at the point where we were just far enough away from the darkspawn to stop for a few hours to rest and eat. There wasn't time to sleep properly, but Leliana dozed with her head on my shoulder while we were propped against one of the few trees, and Chat'len lay his chin on her knee.

I couldn't've slept even if I'd wanted to. The darkspawn were far off, but still close enough to feel. Riordan was pacing the exterior of the camp restlessly while Tesni, Alistair, and Zevran talked in low voices by the fire.

Every now and then I noticed one of the soldiers eyeing them or me with disapproval. They didn't trust us. They didn't like us. Well, they didn't have to. Soon they'd fight darkspawn and understand why we were in charge.

When everyone’d finished eating and was in danger of getting too comfortable, Tesni, Alistair, and Bann Teagan ordered them back up again. Leliana stirred and I smiled at her.

"Ready to fight?"

She smiled back and wrapped her hand around the grip of her bow. "I never thought that I would miss darkspawn."

"Me neither."

When Tesni whistled for us (Come, we hunt!) I jumped to my feet, feeling my heartbeat quicken. Even though we all knew that people were probably going to be killed by the darkspawn, it was hard for us not to share excited looks as we took up our weapons and mounted our horses. We were going to do what we we'd been made to do.

A few hours later we were all assembled on a hill overlooking charred fields. Even if we hadn’t been able to see them from there, the four of us could feel the darkspawn. For the first time, the burning almost felt good, because my sister and brothers were there with me.

And our blood told the darkspawn we were ready. One by one they turned toward us, and screamed their battle shouts before they started running. Tesni raised her bow high in the air, and Alistair raised his sword, which reminded me to raise my dagger. Bann Teagan and Riordan raised their swords after us, and when Tesni shouted we all joined her.

She called for everyone to get ready, and when she commanded them the archers loosed their arrows, sending them raining down on the darkspawn heading toward us. A few moments later she’d shouted again, and we’d shot off to meet the darkspawn head-on.

I couldn’t hear the clanking of the armor and the clash of swords over my blood rushing through me, and when I sunk one of my daggers into the first darkspawn I laughed. Tesni’s battle shout had joy in it and Alistair was grinning like an idiot as corrupted blood spattered our skin and armor.

Every one of Tesni’s arrows hit home, and Alistair and I hacked and slashed through the darkspawn that got through. Soon her quiver was empty and she’d drawn her knives and joined us. I knew that the soldiers and the mages and the rest of our clan were there, but I couldn’t see or hear or feel anything except my brother and sister and the singing in my blood.

And then there wasn’t anything else to kill, and I frowned in disappointment. The only things around us were covered in metal, and the movement had stopped. I looked around to find the soldiers and the mages staring at us, then down at the mass of dead darkspawn at our feet.

That felt good.

---

[1] Emma ir abelas, mireth. – “I’m sorry, Safe Blade.” (“Safe Blade” is Tesni’s term of endearment for Zevran.)

[2] Moi aussi. – “Me, too.”

[3] Merde. – Shit. (French)

[4] Mierda. – Shit. (Spanish)

"Should've killed him."

Inexpressible thanks to ashstoner_021 for this incredible art that we can't stop squeeing about! Seriously, I feel faint. We adore you, Ash!

Comments

[lenna_nightrunner]

Yep!