Vir Lath Sa'vunin Chapters Fifty-Seven and Fifty-Eight

[lenna_nightrunner]

A Dalish-centric AU gen fic featuring two Mahariel Wardens, one bastard prince, and lingering ghosts.

Title: Vir Lath Sa'vunin (We Love One More Day)
Rating: T
Authors: twist_shimmy and lenna_nightrunner
Post Word Count: 3915
Summary: When their parents died, Tesni Mahariel was left to raise her brother Caerwyn with the help of the rest of their clan. True to their penchant for getting into trouble, Caerwyn and Tamlen went hunting one day and ran afoul of a mirror, of all things. The next thing Tesni knew, Caerwyn had been recruited by the Grey Wardens. As if she’d let some shemlen just take her brother away! Determined to keep Caerwyn safe, Tesni goes after them, and antics ensue. She’ll stop the Blight to protect her family, Caerwyn will help--grumbling all the while--and Alistair will do his best to bond with his tattooed and bristly new brethren. When all is said and done, the blurred lines between friendship and blood bonds will draw them down a path that will change all three of them forever.

In which parts are made whole again.

Chapter Fifty-Seven: I Almost Love this Town When I’m By Your Side. (Nada Surf)

TESNI

“¡Madre de los Canciones! Tesora?”[1] Zevran leaped from the bed and pointed at me angrily. “This Warden you found would not let me go get you!”

“Indeed I would not,” the dark-haired Warden said mildly. “All the same, it is good to see you unharmed.”

I crossed the room, ran my thumb along Zevran’s tattoos, and smiled until his scowl had faded. “And I’m glad for that.The last thing we needed was you getting caught, too.”

He glowered over his shoulder at my new brother. “You are lucky she likes you.”

We both ignored Zevran. “You’re looking much better than you were when I saw you last,” I said, turning from my lover to my fellow Warden.

He nodded. “Maker bless our fast healing, easy sleep, and good food. These past two days, not even the archdemon has been able to wake me.”

I sat on the bed and pulled Zevran beside me, then leaned against his shoulder with a heavy sigh. “Let’s hope that happens again tonight. I have... not slept well.” To put it mildly. Being verbally abused by your first love from the Beyond was not a particularly restful experience.

Zevran’s hands found my hair, and he made a noise of disappointment as he inspected my braids with his fingers. “What, they found all of your lock-picks? How did you get out, then?”

“That’s a story for after food and sleep, I think. Which reminds me. We’re leaving at dawn.” I looked at the new Warden. “I’m Tesni, by the way.”

“Riordan, of Jader.” He bowed his head, and I tried to remember if Jader had been on Ferelden’s map. “I take it you have inherited Duncan’s position since Ostagar?”

“I....” Hunh. “I suppose I have, haven’t I? I just sort of took over to keep us all from dying.”

“That is how it tends to happen. Your friend here has been kind enough to tell me what the order has been up to in Ferelden when he was not panicking about you being caught.”

So Jader was outside Ferelden. He sounded a bit like Leliana, so he must be one of the Orlesian Wardens that Duncan had mentioned.

Zevran crossed his arms and muttered to himself in Antivan. “Cada momento, questiones, questiones. El no se calle ninguna minuta. And I was not panicking,” he added in a louder voice. “The dog was panicking.”[2]

I believed him; Zevran was not one to panic. Scheme and plot, definitely, but blind panic? He was a hunter, like me and Caerwyn, and hunters didn’t panic. I did the prudent thing and moved the conversation forward: “So you know about the keep, then, and the army we’ve been gathering?”

Riordan nodded. “You have done better than I could have hoped.” His words filled me with relief, which surprised me. I was trying to think of something to say when he rose and smiled down at me. “I will leave you two alone for now and see you in the morning.”

“Send the dog over,” Zevran said. When I raised an eyebrow, he elaborated: “I had Elgar’nan in with Shale so I could sleep, but he began whining and howling, so Riordan has been putting the dog in his room so she can have a break.”

Good. I didn’t want a dead mabari. But when Elgar’nan’s claws clattered down the hall, I realized just how close that had come to being a reality. He launched himself at me with a desperate howl, and we fell from the bed and onto the floor in a reluctant tangle.

“See?” Zevran chuckled and stared down at us both. “For sanity’s sake, never get captured again, hmmm?”

I stuck my tongue out at him and began soothing my poor mabari. He slept in the bed with me and Zevran that night, but we were too short for it to be bothersome. Shembeds sometimes felt more like swimming than sleeping.

The next morning, Zevran woke me with kisses to my temple and breaths at my ear. “Tesora.”

I opened my eyes to find him smiling down at me. “Mmm?”

“Just checking. For a moment I was afraid that I had dreamed you coming back.”

I sat up and kissed him on the cheek. “Silly. I have survived worse, emma mireth.”[3]

He raised an eyebrow. “Elvish! Nothing insulting, I hope?”

I shook my head, but I couldn’t tell him what it meant all the same. Mireth tu numin’din,[4] the elf who drew his blades and nearly killed himself to free me from my grief. Lethallin wasn’t meaningful enough, but emma vhenan would be unfair to him because Tamlen’s shadow would always come when those words were spoken. He needed something new.

“I’ll tell you what it means when I figure out a good way to translate it.” You’re a killer who makes me feel safe didn’t seem... flattering. Thankfully, he didn’t press the issue.

We dressed and met Riordan for breakfast, and as I watched him eat I decided that it was going to be amazing to be back on the road. “If I can hunt something worth eating tonight, I will cook for us all,” I announced, and had to stifle a smile at how happy they both looked.

“Orlais has ruined my palate, I’m afraid,” Riordan said with a sigh. “Ferelden food leaves little room for enjoyment.”

I blinked at him over my cold ham. “So you were born here?”

He nodded. “Yes, before the Wardens were allowed to return, but I have been in Orlais for a long time. Long enough to think in Orlesian, which to a Fereldan is enough to brand me a traitor.”

I snorted. “Absolute foolishness.”

“Says the woman who will teach no one her language,” Zevran said, and grinned when I scowled at him.

“It’s useless, anyway,” I replied. When he stared at me, I flushed. “Well, it is! We’ve lost a lot of it, so there are some things we just... can’t talk about in elvish.” I looked down at my plate. “It’s sad.”

Zevran chuckled. “No wonder you can say so much in whistles, then!” When Riordan looked confused, his smile grew almost feral. “Perhaps we can teach your new brother on the road, yes? It would be so amusing!”

My brother took a long swallow of water before replying. “You have chosen strange company, sister.”

“If you say that now, the keep will be a shock.”

“And why is that?”

“You’ll see,” I replied, and he shrugged sedately. Caerwyn was likely to accuse him of being no fun almost instantly after meeting him, but I was liking his unflappability more and more with each minute I spent in his time.

We closed out account with Ruth, who seemed relieved at the prospect of no longer housing Shale, and walked out the door and into the throng of shems flooding the dock district. On the way toward the gates I found our merchant friend, told him we were leaving, and asked him to burn any letters that arrived for us. When he agreed, I pressed a sovereign into his hand. “If someone from the palace comes looking for a man to send a crate to the Wardens, I would appreciate it if you accepted their offer.”

“Of course, my lady. It’s been a pleasure doing business.”

“Oh, we’ll be back,” I muttered. Loghain was still alive, after all.

We managed to leave town without being assaulted, which was nice. Once we were away from curious eyes and ears, I turned to Shale. “How did you get free from that mage?”

“The same way I got free from the last mage,” she said. “Paralysis spells wear off eventually.”

“So they do,” I agreed, and tried to banish a series of increasingly disturbing images from my mind. When I seemed utterly doomed to failure, I changed the subject to distract myself. “Would you all like to know how I got out, now?”

When they all agreed--even Shale, which was nice--I launched into the story, growing louder periodically to drown out Zevran’s angry protestations. All three of them seemed to enjoy my rendition of kicking the guard in the face for taking my bow away. It actually made Riordan chuckle, and I found myself running my thumb over the leaf carved on the hand-grip nervously.

“I made this bow, brother,” I explained. “It’s... it has memories.” Memories I kill with.

That night, Riordan sat beside me as I took first watch. I’d offered after seeing how drowsy my meal had made my boys. He nodded at me sleepily and gestured to my bow.

“Forgive me if I offended earlier. I have never known a Dalish.”

I shrugged. “My brother and I have mellowed a great deal since Duncan recruited us.” Or recruited Caerwyn, and I’d decided to tag along.

“That is good to hear.” Riordan looked at the ground and then smirked. “I can only imagine what you must have put Duncan through.”

I shook my head. “He didn’t care. No harm was done.”

My brother turned his blue eyes to mine. “I assure you that he did. Duncan always left himself a soft spot for his recruits. It’s the only way he ever let himself down.”

Unwanted memories from my Joining surfaced, and I felt my jaw clench. “Sure he did. I watched him stab one of his recruits to death, Riordan, simply for being scared.”

Riordan shook his head. “Duncan did what must be done. As do you. Am I to believe the hard choices don’t affect you, either?”

...He had a point, so I drew my knees to my chin and fell silent. I waited until Zevran had crawled into our tent before speaking again. “Anora said she was sending along some encrypted papers and vials she found in the Denerim vault.”

“Then it is possible you may have just gained the ability to create more Wardens, sister.”

“The last thing I want to do is deceive naive people,” I muttered.

“But you want to kill the archdemon, and you will make the necessary choices to do so,” he replied.

I thought about the horse-man Duncan stabbed, whose name I had forgotten even though there was a pendant around my neck meant to remind me of his sacrifice. Suddenly I wanted to apologize to hahren Paivel for hating him so much when I was still with the clan.

It seems my destiny to sing funeral dirges for the ones I held in my arms as babes. I think I know why our ancestors would sleep.

The hunter I had been hadn’t understood why Paivel’s eyes were so hard when he said such bitter words, but the Warden I’d become certainly did. And based on the tense lines around Riordan’s eyes, he did too, but that didn’t stop him from doing what had to be done. I’d failed to learn the lesson from my clan’s hahren, but if I wanted to stop the archdemon, I’d have to learn it from the hahren Warden whose life I had probably saved.

Hahren na elgar him durgen’belannar. My new brother had a stone spirit. As much as I hated to admit it, that was probably good.

---

Chapter Fifty-Eight: I Know a Place Cool and Warm; Cooling My Blood and Warming My Heart (The Descendents)

CAERWYN

“And it was so hot there,” I complained to Alistair. We were sitting in Tesni’s study--neither of us would call it his--alone after dinner, talking about what’d been happening since I left.

He laughed. “And there were darkspawn?”

There wasn’t a word to express how much ‘yes’ was involved in the answer to that, so I just nodded.

“I’ve practically forgotten what they look like.”

Lucky you.

“And, um.” I looked down at my hands. “He was there.”

Alistair’s eyes widened and he leaned forward in his chair. “The archdemon?”

I nodded again.

“...Wow.” He swallowed. “I hadn’t thought.... Well, it makes sense, I mean, that’s where he is. I just hadn’t thought that you might’ve been going there.”

His eyebrows knitted, but I shrugged. “It wasn’t that bad.”

The corner of Alistair’s mouth turned up. “Liar.”

“Got me,” I said, and smiled a bit.

There was a tense silence, then Alistair put his hand on my shoulder. “It’s good to have you back.”

“Good to be back.”

We both settled into our chairs again.

“So what’s Tesni been doing?” I asked.

“Well, she hasn’t been able to tell me much because the letters might be intercepted. She just writes to say she’s all right, and I bet Zev’s helping her try to be sneaky because a lot of it is so vague it’s almost code.”

“Did she say when she’s coming back?”

Alistair shook his head. “I don’t think she knows. She always just says she still has things to do there.”

“But soon?”

“I don’t know.”

I tried to sound like it didn’t matter. “Okay.”

We fell into silence again, staring at the fire where it burned in the hearth in front of us. I thought of all the orange and the liquid fire and the archdemon and closed my eyes. I drew one of my knees up toward my chest and rested my chin on it.

“When you two left, Teagan and Wynne thought I was pining after Tesni.” Alistair chuckled when I made an expression of disgust.

“Oh, you think that’s bad. Then they thought it was Zev!”

I shuddered dramatically, and then we were both laughing.

“Did you have to order people around?”

“You don’t know the half of it,” he groaned. “I’ve had to make all sorts of decisions.”

“And you’ve got the troops obeying your every command?”

“It seems that way,” Alistair said, “but I’m convinced they make faces behind my back.”

“No, that’s just me.” Tesni would’ve been proud of how blank I kept my expression.

Alistair tried to keep a straight face, but after a few seconds he couldn't hold back his laughter.

"Come on," he said. "Let's write a letter to Tesni."



During the first week after I got back, Alistair and I were inseparable. I always sat between him and Leliana at meals, and when we weren’t sparring or staying up talking long into the night I was following him around the keep, making fun of how everyone stood at attention and called him “Warden” whenever he got near them.

Which was all the time. Both the soldiers and the mages seemed very interested in him, and now that I was there they didn't really know what to think about me. An antisocial Dalish with a half-black face didn't match up with the traditional image of a Grey Warden as well as Alistair did.

But they loved watching us spar. It was like we were some kind of special people with powers no one else had. I guessed that was technically true, but it wasn't like those things made us much better at fighting each other.

"You've gotten faster!" Alistair said when I dodged his shield as it was just about to slam into me.

"Doubt Zevran'd agree." I ducked, dodged, and weaved my way between Alistair’s sword and shield a few more times, but then my foot slid too far out.

His sword came toward me, and I tried to knock it to the side with my dagger just enough so if it hit me it'd just cut into my chestplate a little as I turned away.

It did cut into my chestplate, and the leather held together. My ribs didn't. I felt the sickening sensation of bone cracking before the pain hit me. I hadn't gotten hit with a swing that powerful in a long time, and I made a mental note never to spar with Sten if Alistair hit that hard.

"You've gotten stronger," I wheezed, and Alistair threw off his helmet and rushed to my side.

"Maker, Caerwyn, I'm sorry! How bad is it?"

"Ribs." I winced.

Alistair was looking around, I thought for Wynne, but then a flat-ear--city elf--was next to me.

"Take off your armor,” she ordered.

Yes, take off your armor. Never mind that you can't even move your arms.

I snorted, which hurt, and Alistair undid the buckles for me. Then the mage's hands were under my shirt, her fingers prodding at my ribs.

"Ow!" I glared at her. "That hurts."

"You can have bandages instead if you'd prefer," she said, and arched an eyebrow at me.

I grumbled, but she finished feeling my ribs and then my skin crawled from the sensation of magic flowing into my chest and side. There was a minute or two where Alistair stood over us worriedly and I tried to keep as still as possible, and then the mage pulled her hands away.

"Better?" she asked. I shifted and moved from side to side carefully, but the pain was basically gone. "You'll have some bruising, but your bones are fine now."

"Bruising?" Usually mages could heal bruises too if they worked a bit longer. Was she incompetent or just lazy?

"For complaining," she said. Then she smirked at me before going back over to where the soldiers were sparring.

I glared after her while Alistair laughed. "Wynne's let them get too cocky."

"Actually, I have," he said ruefully. "They answer directly to me now."

"Fun." I rolled my shoulders, trying to get that weird magic feeling out of my muscles that lingered like a bad aftertaste.

Alistair shrugged. "It's not that bad."

"But still weird?"

"Completely weird." He nodded his head emphatically. "Soldiers I can handle, but mages? I don't understand why they'd want to listen to me."

"Good, though. We need them to, right?"

"Yeah," he agreed, "and I think they're going to help a lot. Some of them are really impressive. You should try sparring with one."

"A mage?" When he nodded, I snorted. "I'd stab it in the first five seconds."

"Not if you can't get to it."

My eyes narrowed and I crossed my arms. "Find me one and I'll be ready."



Green.

Creators curse it, I'm trying to sleep!

Choking on hot air, liquid fire below me, but green, everything green again. I’m on the edge of that trench, looking down so far below me I can't figure out what’s rock and what’s fire in all that orange. I can’t decide which color I hate more.

Then his enormous batwings beating the air, pushing it against me like hot wind, blowing me away from the edge. And across the trench--

No. No, at least give them a fair chance! Tesni and Tamlen and Alistair and Leliana and I can't do anything, and I'm screaming their names but they can't hear me and then there's only fire. His fire, and then they--

"Caerwyn." A soft voice near my ear. "It's all right." Leliana's hand was rubbing my chest. "It's all right, mon amour. It isn't real."

I tried to follow her voice back into consciousness. I felt my heart thudding in my chest before I registered the burning in my blood. Not all of the nightmare'd been from my imagination.

"It isn't real," she repeated in a soothing tone.

But some of it was real. And some of it could be. Creators willing, I'd keep the rest from happening.

Even if it meant me being in that fire instead.

"Tesni," I said, before I remembered she wasn't there. A cold knot of worry formed in my stomach. Why wasn't she back yet?

"I'm sure she's fine." Leliana slid her hand over my short hair. "She is Tesni, after all."

Liar. There was no way anyone could know if Tesni was okay. She'd basically walked into a den of wolves and expected them not to attack her. But Leliana was right: if there was anyone I didn't have to worry about, it was Tesni.

I pulled Leliana close to me and buried my face in her hair. I breathed deep, and her scent soothed my heartbeat, but not my blood. I needed my brother.

"I--"

"Go," she said with a smile. "I'll see you in the morning."

I hesitated, but she pushed at my chest, so I kissed her and crawled out of the bed into the cold air. I winced as my feet hit the stone floor, pulled on trousers and a shirt, and hurried toward the door.

As my hand closed around the knob, I felt that familiar tingling in my blood. When I opened the door, Alistair was standing right in front of me looking sheepish. When I met his eyes, he smiled weakly. It was hard to shake off the nightmares, especially when you were alone.

Neither of us said anything as I led the way to Tesni's room. It was cold beneath her sheets, and we each curled up in our usual places, waiting to get warm again.

We left the space where she usually slept empty between us, but I could catch her scent very faintly, and feel Alistair's blood next to me. I focused on that feeling as I slipped back to sleep, and slept through till morning.



I still hadn’t gotten used to how loud the keep was now. After spending weeks underground with no voices except the four of ours and those of the things we were killing, a hall full of soldiers and mages was a little overwhelming. Their voices echoed off the stone walls and the sound of a hundred forks and knives scraping over plates hurt my teeth almost as much as blades on blades. I made a mental note to either sleep in or get up early from then on so I could eat my breakfast with pain-free teeth.

At least the rolls and eggs were soft. I’d have to avoid anything chewy until--

That feeling.

Tingling in my blood, but it wasn’t Alistair. Was I imagining it? I stood up and looked toward the door.

"Tesni."

"What?" said Leliana, looking up from her porridge.

Alistair stood up, too. "Are you sure? How far away?"

"I don't know." I started walking toward the front door of the keep, hearing Alistair’s footsteps behind me. It was her. It had to be. I couldn't see her, but she was there, getting closer. As soon as I got outside I broke into a run.

"Tesni!" I shouted. I thought I heard an answer from the forest, but it was too far away. I shouted again, then--A single arrow shot up into the sky through the trees. I grinned and tore off into the forest, following her signal and that feeling in my blood.

As I got closer I heard a whistle: Here! Trail hot! I ran faster, dodging tree branches and leaping over roots and rocks, until finally I could see her there, standing in a clearing next to Dorf’asha[5] with the others around her, beaming at me.

I launched myself into her arms so forcefully I almost knocked us both to the ground. She laughed and steadied us as I squeezed her around the waist.

"Mamae," I panted, trying to catch my breath. "Aneth ara."[6]

She was hugging me tightly and petting my short hair. "It's all right. It's all right, da'vhenan,” she said in that motherly tone I’d missed so much. “I'm fine. Are you?"

I hid my face in her shoulder and nodded awkwardly. "You're here."

---

[1] “¡Madre de los Canciones! Tesora?” “Mother of Song! (Andraste) Darling?”

[2] “Cada momento, questiones, questiones. El no se calle ninguna minuta.” “Every moment, questions, questions. He didn’t shut up for a second.”

[3] emma mireth “my safe blade”

[4] Mireth tu numin’din “Tearcutter” (lit. “safe blade that makes tears stop”)

[5] Dorf’asha “Grey Girl” (Tesni’s horse)

[6] Aneth ara. A friendly greeting, lit. “my safe place”

"And I was not panicking. The dog was panicking."

Comments

[twist_shimmy]

“You’ll see,” I replied, and he shrugged sedately.
This reminds me of Alistair's memory of Duncan when you ask what to expect as a Grey Warden. I'm not sure if it was intentional, but I love that it's in the fic <3

Totally intentional. I didn't think anyone would catch it. >>;

[valiasedai]

I didn't think anyone would catch it. >>;

I played it waaaaay too much last summer. And obsessed over Duncan. And anything Steve Valentine voiced. *coughs*