Fic: AOA chapter 80

[amhran_comhrac]

Title: Apostates of Amaranthine chapter 80
Characters: Anders/f!Amell (Maggie)
Rating: M (this chapter T)
Word Count: 5500
Summary:A side trip as they head south for recruits, and parties

Sitting in my office, trying to finish the final arrangements for our trip to the Dalish, I looked up at the knock on the open door. Without waiting for a response, Rose entered and took a seat. "Can I go with you? I've always been curious to see the Dalish."

"Just you?"

She shrugged. "Well, Roland and I."

Pushing my hair back, I made a face. Rose got up, closing the door, and returned to her chair. "Out with it, Maggie. I know that look."

"You're an elf, and your husband is a human," I said.

"Wow, you don't say," she replied.

"You think the Dalish would smile on that?" I asked. "I mean, I don't care. Obviously that sort of thing means nothing to me, and if you say you want to go, you'll go. I just wanted to make sure you knew what you were walking into."

"And what would I be walking into?"

I shrugged, trying to remember back to my encounter with them. "Well, I'm not entirely sure. They were… coldly polite to me. Or hostile because I was a human in general, nothing specific about who I was involved with. The woman who is now the Keeper was absolutely wonderful, and although she's not the overall leader, we'll be working with her more than anyone."

"But?"

"But the moment they saw Zevran and I shared a tent he started hearing comments from more than a few people. I got dirty looks, but he was called a traitor. Sometimes worse. I don't know if they were quiet to me because I'm a warden and they respect the order, or because I'm a mage and they didn't want to get me too angry, or even if it was just because I'm a human and they saw me as below notice, but…" I shrugged, pushing my hair back.

"Lovely," she said.

"You only want to go more," I said, closing my inkwell.

"I do," she admitted, grinning. "I shouldn't, but…"

"Being a troublemaker is fun?'

Rose laughed. "It really is! That's your influence."

"Well, go pack," I said. "We leave in three days. Don't cause too much trouble."

"Or Fiona will yell at us both." We both laughed at that. "Tell me the truth, Maggie… Did Weisshaupt send her to keep you in line?"

"Not at all!" I insisted. "I invited her to take over the peak. Since you wouldn't."

"I won't sit behind some desk," she said. "I need to do something with myself."

I rolled my eyes at her. "Sitting behind a desk is hardly all I do. I also get to kill many things. I captured on occasion. And cause riots. And paw at my husband in public. The job has a great deal of variety."

"Only the first sounds appealing," she chuckled. "I can do without the riots and imprisonment. And I suspect if I laid a single finger on your husband you would kill me."

"I would," I agreed, smiling at her. "But… pray for our health," I laughed. "Since if me, Nathaniel, Sigrun, and Anders all get ourselves killed guess who's in charge."

She froze on the verge of making another joke. "You're kidding," Rose said after a moment.

"Absolutely not," I replied quickly. "And at that point I'd be dead so I wouldn't have to hear you complain. Be glad you didn't join fifteen years later or I'd have named you my successor."

"Wow," she said after a moment. "I don't know what to say…"

"Mad?"

"No," she said. "Surprised, though. Really surprised."

"You're kidding me," I said. "I offer you first crack at almost any position of leadership that comes up, even though I know you'll just tell me you'd rather be out hunting down darkspawn than running some garrison."

Rose shrugged. "I'm still surprised. In a good way, though. I didn't realize how much you trusted me."

"Of course I do," I said. Rose just shook her head, wandering off not long after, still looking shocked.

We left a few days after the Wintersend celebrations. Fiona was slightly horrified by them, but I suppose I couldn't be surprised by that. I knew the Ferelden traditions were… unique. We all ate an enormous meal with lots of cheese before spending half the night dancing around the bonfire. The weather was horrid, something we were all thrilled by. "Why are you all going outside to dance in the snow?" Fiona had demanded.

"Because snow on Wintersend is good!" Rose said, rushing past her.

I nodded. "It means the old hag can't gather her firewood, so she'll have to let winter end soon."

"The old hag?" She stared at me. "What is this, the Glory age? Does the Chantry know you still do this?"

"Why wouldn't they?" Anders asked. "When I was growing up in Gwaren the Wintersend bonfire was always in the Chantry yard."

"Ferelden will be a very interesting nation once you become civilized," she mused.

"None of that!" I laughed, grabbing her arm and pulling her towards the door. "Come on, what do they do in Orlais for Wintersend?"

"The Chantry priests bless candles they pass out to parishioners."

"Boring," I replied. "Ours has ale." That got her attention. Since arriving Fiona had developed a great appreciation for Ferelden ales. Once I said that she pulled on her cloak and stomped outside behind everyone else. I opened the gates to any of the locals who wanted to join us, too. That was an old tradition from before the occupation, according to everything I'd read, and I liked the idea of reviving it. Really, a little ale and cheese was a small expense for how much goodwill we would get in exchange. So, we danced arm in arm until dawn with the farmers who lived closest to the keep, and the people who lived in what appeared to be the beginnings of a small village that had sprung up just outside our walls over the last couple years.

The ashes of the fire were still piled in the courtyard as we packed the wagon. Rose had decided the risk of being insulted by the Dalish was minimal and tossed her pack under the bench before sitting down. Runi paced the courtyard nervously. "Sit!" I told her after she passed me for the tenth time.

"Sorry," she said, hopping up. "I'm just nervous."

"Really?" I said. "I had no idea."

"You really think I'm ready for this?"

"I wouldn't have appointed you if I didn't," I reminded her. "I had been a Warden for a year less than you when I became Commander. You'll be fine." She nodded and sat down, still looking worried. I felt bad for her. She had joined with her best friend, and her best friend didn't
survive. The Keep didn't hold many good memories for her, I hoped a change of venue might make things a bit better.

Our trip South was mostly uneventful. We were attacked by small bands of darkspawn several times, but I didn't feel too concerned about it. They were very tiny groups, nothing too dangerous, and probably drawn from nearby caves or even underground just by the presence of so many Wardens.

When we were only a day's ride from the Dalish lands I had everyone veer off-track briefly. "Should I come with you?" Anders asked.
"No," I said, grabbing the burlap sack I'd carried from the Keep. "I should do this alone." Well, almost alone, as Isolde, my near-constant shadow, padded along at my side.

He nodded and stood, leaning against the wagon as I walked into the white stone ruins. Snow still covered the ground in a deep blanket this far south. I was amazed by how much seemed intact after so many years. This was the first time I'd returned since the blight.

Walking to the gate that led to the main camp I paused, hands resting on the wood. It was right here that someone saluted me for the first time, the guard who had opened the gate so I could pass. I had been so confused that I spun around, wondering what important person was following me. The land beyond was a great field of white, marked by the occasional tracks of forest animals and what might have been darkspawn. I would never be able to tell where we had been.

Turning back to the remains of the king's camp I glanced around. There. Hiking through the snow I was surprised to find I could still close my eyes and picture exactly as everything had been laid out. Here was the king's tent, there was Loghain's. The kennel where Dane had been recuperating, the mess tent table where Daveth and I sat sharing our worries about what the Grey Wardens would do to us the next morning, the ruins where I met Alistair for the first time… I passed dozens of small landmarks as I walked across Ostagar.

The old temple ruins: a shrine to an old god, one of the strange Tevinter dragon deities. How apt that it was here I began my life as a Grey Warden. I didn't know if it was to one specific god, or all of them. I suppose no one would ever know, there simply wasn't enough left of the building to tell.

Casting the burlap sack aside I glanced around, leaning against the wall. Deciding I had found the location where Duncan stood, holding the chalice, I carefully placed the wreath of dried Andraste's Grace and cornflowers on the ground and kneeled. "Draw your last breath, my friends, Cross the Veil and the Fade and all the stars in the sky. Rest at the Maker's right hand, and be Forgiven." Standing, I whispered "in war, victory. In peace, vigilance. In death, sacrifice" andsaluted briefly, adding "until I join you," before turning to leave.

As I walked through the ruins someone called out to me. "Is someone else here?"

"In the King's camp," I called back in reply.

A tattooed man stepped out from around a corner, dark colored mabari painted with pale kaddis at his side. "I'm sorry if I startled you," he said. "I fought. In the battle. Whenever I'm in the area I like to stop here and remember my friends." He looked me over. "Did you lose a relative in the battle?"

"No," I said. "Well, not as such. I lost my brothers, but they weren't related by blood." He gave me a strange look and I turned slightly to display the dual griffin emblem on the shoulder of my cloak.

"Grey Warden?" he asked. I nodded. "My apologies then, I meant no offense."

I shrugged. "You caused no offense, so no apology is needed. I know only a handful of women fought in the battle. I was here, too, after all."

He paused, looking at me more closely. "But the only Grey Wardens who survived were… Maker's breath! That means you're…"

"Warden Commander Margaret," I said quickly, before he could fill in the blanks with one of my more ostentatious titles.

"Commander Tomas of the Ash Warriors," he said after a pause, nodding at me once he seemed to realize I didn't want to be fawned over.
Saying something about being honored to meet me, he excused himself to return to his fellows who had been waiting outside. I replied with something I hoped was appropriately polite and did the same. I felt better as I left knowing Alistair and I weren't the only survivors who still remembered. I relayed the story to Anders as we continued on to the Dalish lands.

"Someone else was wandering around Ostagar?" he said, surprised. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," I said. "Why wouldn't I be?"

He glanced at me. "Well, you haven't been… I mean, since we got back, whenever you met strange men…"

Blinking in surprise I glanced at him. "You're right," I said, shocked. "I'm fine, though. I was fine, too. I didn't even think about it…"

"That's good," Anders said, resting a hand on my leg and beaming at me. "I knew it was only a matter of time." I smiled and looked out at the road.

We reached the Dalish the next day. I could see smoke in the distance, campfires or chimneys, and was pondering the distance when two archers stepped into the road, blocking our path. Anders pulled back on the reigns, bringing the wagon to a halt. Rose did likewise in the wagon behind us, the horses making a noise of protest. "You have entered the sovereign Dalish lands, state your business."

"Grey Wardens, here by invitation from Keeper Lanaya."

The man who spoke, apparently the lead scout, said something to his associates before turning back to us. "Andaran atish'an, Wardens," he said before offering directions.

Hopping down in the middle of a circle of small round huts, I waived seeing the familiar figure of Lanaya walking towards us. She called out "aneth ara" before taking my hands in hers in greeting. I introduced the others quickly. She was, not surprisingly, especially interested in the elf Wardens, although it became more than obvious after only a moment that Fiona had no patience for her questions. I saw her jaw tense briefly when she realized Rose and Roland were a couple, but Lanaya didn't say anything. I didn't know if the other Dalish would be so polite, though.

She led us to a small wooden building on the edge of the encampment. "Your husband," she whispered to me. "He is… not entirely human, is he?"

"You can tell?" I said, surprised.

She nodded. "Sometimes. I take it I'm right?"

"You are," Anders spoke up. "I get my fantastic hearing from my mother." She then began to assault him with question after question about what it was like to be half-human, if his mother's family accepted him, if he felt accepted by other humans, and on… "No, I can't say I'm particularly accepted by most humans," Anders said, sounding amused. "But then, that's more due to my being able to shoot lightning from my fingertips than any disdain on account of my parentage. Most people judge me on that well before learning anything else." He shrugged. "I suppose I got trouble for it as a boy, but among mages things like that don't matter, so once I ended up in the Circle it wasn't an issue."

"Oh," she said, sounding disappointed he couldn't answer her questions in any more detail. "I'd forgotten… your people don't acknowledge that magic is a gift." Lanaya shook her head. "I will never understand that."

I only nodded in reply, there wasn't much I could say, after all.

After getting Runi set up in what would be our small compound, with the half-dozen Wardens who would be joining her, I spent a couple hours with Anders and Fiona, teaching Lanaya the arcane warrior spells.

Returning to the main encampment, I saw the Warden hopefuls sitting with Rose and Roland around a fire. There were plenty of permanent structures here, small round huts, but the Dalish seemed to treat them as they did aravels. Someplace to sleep and keep your stuff, with most of your time spent outside. Before I could take my own seat I saw Rose fly from hers, both daggers drawn. Moving almost faster than I could see, she pinned one of the Dalish to the ground, her foot to their neck. "How about you say that again, this time to my face," she hissed. "You think I can't hear you whispering about me?"

Sighing, I sat down, watching the scene unfold. Anders and Fiona both looked at me, I shrugged. From what I could tell this was a very personal argument. "Did you warn her?" Anders whispered to me. I nodded. "Well, did you warn them?"

"That I didn't do," I said. "Should I have? I mean, are Grey Wardens known for their gentle good natures?"

"I am," he said. I made a face at him and we continued to watch the two women face off. Which wasn't much of a face off, really, when it came down to it. Roland caught my eye and shook his head. He stood and sat next to me, whispering quietly.

"Rose, let her up," I called once Roland told me what had happened. She glanced at me and nodded, still grimacing. Sheathing her daggers, Rose stepped back, walking over to stand with us. The dalish recruits looked at me, expecting a reaction. "Go home," I said to the woman still on the ground.

Everyone stared at me. "What?" I said.

"You're punishing her?" one of the recruits finally said. "She wasn't the one in the dirt!"

"I'm not punishing anyone," I said. "I'm not taking her as a Warden, though, that's for damn sure." No one seemed inclined to stop staring at me. "Fine," I said, sighing and pushing my hair back. "You want to know why? First, I have no patience for bigots. Of any kind. Second, I hate idiots almost as much, and only an idiot would think they could get away with insulting two of us without even arming themselves first." I looked at the woman on the ground, who was stiffly getting to her feet. "I mean, really, what did you think would happen? Did you hope she would cry? You do realize we're Grey Wardens, not a traveling theater troupe, right?"

Anders burst out laughing at that, and Roland joined in a moment later. "Oh, I can just see that," he said. "The next time someone calls you a witch I'll have to hold your hand while you cry. And then we can all put on a really, really horrid production of The Antivan Tragedy. "

"I don't know, I might be a decent actress," I said. "I'm a good dancer."

"And you have the singing voice of someone strangling a small child," Anders countered.

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Anyways, not the point. The point is that we kill monsters. On a very regular basis, no less. It takes a lot more than mean words to bring any of us to tears."

The woman who started the fight made a face at me. I didn't care, I was right after all.

"And third," I added, "anyone that easily and quickly overpowered just isn't good enough for me. I mean, she had you on the ground in about five seconds!"

"Not bad for a… what was it?" Rose put a fingertip to her lips, looking lost in thought. "Flat-eared traitor to her kind?"

"I think that was it exactly," Roland said.

"You have the best memory," Rose said to him before planting herself on his lap and proceeding to make a very public statement by way of her tongue shoved halfway down his throat.

"You know, we do that in public and someone yells at us," Anders mused. "Usually the king."

The woman who had insulted Rose stood up and stormed off. "Anyone else have a problem?" I asked. Rose and Roland broke off their kiss and stared across the fire, challenging the recruits to speak up. "Feel the need for any smart comments?" They all went silent. The two who Roland said had been giggling at the rude jokes about him and Rose looked at their boots. The others looked at the fire. "Well, let's just forget all this unpleasantness ever happened. We have a long trip ahead of us, we should all enjoy a night not having to worry about watch shifts and my horrible campfire cooking."

"Sorry," Rose said after a moment, voice low enough only we could hear.

"For?"

"You did warn me."

"Doesn't make what she said any less wrong or rude." I glanced over at her. "I can't judge, when someone commented to Zevran and I overheard I hit the bitch with lightning. Shoot, if she'd said something to Anders she would probably be dead right now. Or wishing she was." Rose snickered at that, but Anders sighed.

"You know, I can take care of myself," he said.

"But dangerously overreacting to defend you is one of my few joys in life. You would take that from me?" He rolled his eyes and I turned back to Rose. "I wouldn't worry about it. If they want to join us they need to know we're all equal. The others can think on that until we get home."
The recruits did seem far more open-minded once we left for home the next day. Or they made a good show of it at least, talking to everyone and being as friendly as we could hope. One actually made a point of apologizing to me for what happened, insisting the others were more curious about how people outside the Dalish lived than anything. "If we hated everyone but our own people it wouldn't make much sense to leave and join you, would it?" she had asked me.

I had to admit, she made a good point. "Honestly, I'm not the one to apologize to. And you're not the one who owes anybody an apology. You didn't say it."

"I apologized to Rose and Roland first," she said. "But I wanted to apologize to you. It didn't exactly cast us in the best light." She seemed reassured once I promised we wouldn't hold one rude person against everyone.

We were perhaps two days out from the Dalish lands when a larger group of darkspawn attacked us. I couldn't claim to be surprised. They did attack us whenever we traveled in groups, although since there were only five Wardens with us now it shouldn't have been that bad.
"Maggie!" I could hear Fiona shout as I pulled my dagger from the throat of the last ogre.

"Over here," I replied. "Just a second." She looked up, confused.

"I thought you were just behind me."

"That was me," Anders said.

She gave him a strange look. "Even your spells feel the same now?" Fiona shook her head. "Well, one of you come look at this." Anders walked over, I wasn't far behind. Fiona reached down, flipping the dead hurlock to its back. "Oh good," Anders said. "And here I thought we got them all."

"Shit," I muttered. "It say anything good?"

"Nothing I could understand," she said. I sighed, frustrated but not wanting to say anything. Fiona's first language was Orlesian, and she had spent at least twenty five years speaking nothing but the Anderfels language. The darkspawn were hard enough for me to understand and I was a native speaker of the language they used. For her it would have probably sounded like slurred nonsense.

"I caught the end," Roland said. "Nothing helpful, though. Just the usual 'you won't defeat us, we'll avenge the Architect' garbage."

"All right," I said. "I can't sense anything else around here, can you?" Fiona shook her head. "Nothing we can do but burn them and mark our map." I spit in the dirt, trying to get the taste of blood from my mouth, and shook a bit of flesh from my hair. "Let's hope we find an inn tonight. If I'm not mistaken there's one a few miles up on the old Imperial highway." I hopped back into the wagon. "I must be getting soft. I never used to care about wandering around drenched in blood."

"You know, I'm not going to complain about that," Anders said. "It really isn't the kind of dirty I enjoy." I giggled and Fiona rolled her eyes.
As we made our way North we stopped in several of the larger towns to look for more recruits. Although I wished it hadn't been necessary, it turned out I was able to show the Dalish that I would stand up for them just as much as I had for Rose. Several people who seemed otherwise promising balked when they saw their fellow recruits, the facial tattoos unmistakable. One was so enraged at being told to leave in favor of elves he actually made the mistake of attacking me. Fiona did manage to stop me before I killed him, although I couldn't see why. He attacked me first, after all.

Over the next few months Fiona went on several more recruitment missions. Sometimes with me, sometimes with other wardens. I suspect she would have gone alone but that was one of the few things I'd put my foot down on. Ferelden was far more rural than Orlais, and from what I knew bandits were more common. A trip of any length would usually require at least one night in a tent. You couldn't go any distance and count on being able to stop in a town or find an inn. Someone could very easily slit her throat in her sleep if she was alone in some clearing without anyone keeping a watch before she'd even know it.

At the beginning of Drakonis we received word that the queen had given birth to two healthy boys and was recovering as well as anyone could hope. Although Varel objected until he was literally red in the face, I spent a small fortune throwing an enormous party in the middle of the city to celebrate the birth of an heir to the throne. I'd asked Teagan and Fergus Cousland what I should do, both said as local lord I would need to have some kind of parade or celebration or people would think I was cheap. Or even worse, disloyal. Teagan went one further and said that, because most people knew the king and I were as close as any siblings, everyone would expect me to do something rather lavish. So I decided to play it safe and just copy what Fergus was doing in Highever.

A couple thousand sovereigns went towards several days of music, food, and ale for anyone in the banneron who wanted to come. I was lucky we found out first- that meant rooms in the inn. By the time word spread and freeholders began pouring through the city gates there wasn't a room to be found anywhere in the city. People were literally camping on the docks and in the streets. It was a lot of money, but honestly, we had it to spend. We would more than make it up from taxes alone in the next couple years. Actually, observing how crowded the city was, we would probably make up at least half of it with the taxes on every room in the city being rented at once.

"Isn't this fun?" I asked Nathaniel as he, Anders, Sigrun, and I danced a reel with several of the local merchants and their wives.

"It actually is," he admitted. Of course, he was also much drunker than anyone would ever suspect if they didn't know him.

Halfway through the next song Anders squeezed my hand, jerking his head towards the tables. Someone had just replenished the food. We descended on the table as soon as the song ended. I was glad to see most people were just drunk enough not to fawn over us. Or even pay us the slightest bit of attention.

A few people wandered over while we ate. Most seemed curious about when I would have an heir. I made sure to explain to everyone that my title would go to the next Commander of the Grey, not to any of my relations. I even managed to get through a conversation with Ser Bryant and Ser Irminric. I felt like my heart was going to jump from my chest the entire time and had to leave one of my hands in my lap, with Anders holding the other so they wouldn't notice them shaking, but otherwise I think I did an impressive job of not looking like a complete lunatic. "Are you all right?" he whispered to me once they had left to help themselves to more ale.

I nodded. "Better. I don't want to offend them by acting strange. They're good people, they don't deserve that. Even if the armor does make me want to hide now." I sighed. "I have to get over it quick, though. I'm sure there will be plenty of templars in the Denerim cathedral. The last thing we need is me shaking so much I drop a prince on the floor.

"I don't think anyone noticed a thing," Anders said. "And I'm sure you'll do fine. Relax, have another drink."

He grabbed a pitcher from the table and refilled my glass. I giggled as he shoved it towards me enthusiastically. "Why Lord Anders, if I didn't know better I'd think you were trying to get me drunk."

"I only want you to catch up," he laughed. "Why? Worried I'll try and take advantage of you?"

That caused me to burst out laughing. "Unless you plan to ask me for a raise while I'm seeing double I don't think it would even be possible."

"Hm, now there is a thought," he said, grinning. "Of course, I usually just spend all my money on fancy equipment and presents for you…"

I took another sip of my drink once I'd stopped laughing. "Oh, maybe I should slow down."

"Why?"

"People are staring. I must have drunk-face or something." An older couple was watching us from several tables away. They both looked
away when they saw I had noticed.

"Drunk-face?"

"You know," I said. "When you've had too much and can only make some kind of blank slack-jawed idiotic expression. Drunk-face." Of course, by then I was rather drunk.

"You do not have… drunk-face," he laughed. "They're probably looking since you're, well, kind of famous. The whole hero thing."

"Ugh. I'm drinking to forget that!"

"Well, maybe they've never seen mages up close before. Lots of people haven't, you know."

"Maybe," I agreed. "Or Grey Wardens. That's even more rare."

"Like unicorns. Except covered in darkspawn blood. And bipedal. And not imaginary. And it isn't a crime against nature to have sex with a Grey Warden. And people are mostly scared of Grey Wardens. Hm… maybe we're not so much like unicorns."

I stared at him blankly for a moment before sliding halfway out of my chair, laughing hysterically as all worries of looking drunk in public left my mind.

---

So the Fereldan Wintersend celebration is an extremely pared-down Imbolic, while the Orlesians have Candlemas. I kind of like the idea of the 'barbarians' still holding onto remnants of pre-Chantry celebrations and not knowing why.